Lizardyoga’s Weblog

November 24, 2009

At the reference library today

Definitely need to think of some snappier titles for these posts.  Back to working at the library today as Mark seems to be better.  had an email from Artichoke, the people who ran the Plinth project, asking me if I would like to talk to some women’s magazines about my experience.  I said I would.

Working on my stories today.  Some of them seem very lame indeed, and all of them need lots of work.  The radio play is stuck at the moment – but when things are going well I get a real sense that it all works together.  Not feeling terribly inspired today tho.  Tired.

Have you ever noticed how few indoor seats there are?  If you want to sit and have a packed lunch without getting rained on, there are not too many options.

Reading a book called “Mezzanine” by Nicholson Baker.  It is something I read years ago and nearly bought for Mark, even though at that time we weren’t together.  It concerns the minutiae of life, the things we all notice on a subliminal level but don’t pay attention to, such as the nature of the hole in which you insert your straw in a cup of take-away coffee; and what happens to plastic straws when inserted in a cup of fizzy pop (not a problem I ever have to contend with) and how they have designed them to fit exactly into the lid so the straw doesn’t bob up and out of the drink.

I call it Proust for shoppers.

I am also reading Proust again, first in the English, then in the French.  I only have one volume in the French – in fact, it turned out to be the second part of  volume 5, La Prisonniere – and it starts, bizarrely, in the middle of a paragraph.  Took me ages to find it.

Took Mark ages to find the book, too.  It was my Xmas present last year.

I love Proust.  If I had a second life running alongside the first, I’d use it to read Proust, and write all my responses to him.  And  write down all the quotable stuff.  Actually, I’ve found you begin by writing the odd sentence and end by copying it all.

That’s all folks!  See you next time on the Muppet Show.

August 15, 2009

Words, words, words…

I used to be a huge fan of Neil Young.  I haven’t stopped being a fan, it’s just that all his stuff is on vinyl and I don’t have a good way of listening to it- not without removing all the stuff on top of the record player and dusting it and checking the needle and and and  *

You get the picture.  I was thinking today, the reason I like writing is that every copy of a work is the original.  Whereas with a painting, there’s nothing like the original work and prints etc can only give a feel for what it’s like, with writing, so long as the text is faithfully reproduced, every copy has exactly the same power as the original.  There’s nothing to be gained – except by the scholar – by looking at the original manuscript.  There’s something very democratic about that – and also something easy, in practical terms.  Especially nowadays in this age of computers.

So.  Neil Young.  One of my favourite tracks was “Words (between the lines of age)”.  I used to listen to it over and over.  It was when he was in his electric phase.

Which brings us to the Dane.  Last night the origin of the suffix “by” came up – in the Midlands there are a number of place names that have this, and it comes from Danish – and that gave another outing to the joke “terby or not terby” (see previous post http://lizardyoga.wordpress.com/2008/09/12/ladimir-and-oestrogen-2/).

Last night was great – an outing to a country pub, an underused reservoir, unseen Perseids, a pound lost and found, a necklace also lost and found, and some good conversation.  Thanks Claire!

-  What is the matter that you read, my lord?

-  Words, words, words

(loosely remembered from Hamlet).

Kirk out

PS Beer festival and curry today.  Mark is going to Nottingham.

PPS Jan, who is a mathematician and therefore To Be Trusted, shares my dislike of “numbers” instead of “figures”.  (see previous post here http://lizardyoga.wordpress.com/2009/05/12/and-another-thing-2/)

she says it’s to do with dumbing down.

*  Missed the chance here to make a joke about “the needle and the damage done”.

August 2, 2009

Mark’s marvellous meds

Really good stuff – it goes all zingy in your mouth and then your brain starts to feel whizzy and your temples feel the blood again and, hey presto!  you’re starting to feel well on your way to recovery!

What do we want?  A gradual recovery!

When do we want it?  Phased in over a period of days!

It may not be snappy but it works.  Honest.  If you’re interested, it’s a mixture of slippery elm and oh damn something else – I’ve forgotten. * Mark has gone off to make coffee.

Holly is going to Lifebeat today – a young people’s camp where they do all sorts of stuff.  She is being given a lot of assistance with her place, for which relief much thanks!

We will go to church this morning and if I am up to it I may meet Peter for a drink or two in some pub called, uninspiringly, The Donkey.  I can’t remember what it used to be called.  The Horse and Hound or Dog and Duck.  Something normal.

I am not, however, drinking alcohol as I don’t think it will do my low blood pressure any good.

Incidentally, whenever I think of the Horse and Hound (which, thankfully, is not often, I pronounce it mentally The Hawce end Hind.  I used to have a book called “High Taw Tawk Propah-leah”, which was quite funny.  There was a guest speaker once came to one of our school Junior Speech Days (on which may the gods spit) called Miss Povah, and she talked exactly like that.  I spent the whole summer imitating her.)

But I digress.

Enjoy the day.  Get your browsers tuned to One&Other.co.uk and check out the webcam.  Don’t forget Weds at 1 pm!

Kirk out

Additional: since I am not physically 100% I may take the opportunity to do some poems up there – which was my original thought anyway!  I have one brewing in my head called “Peace one Day”

* Not slippery elm but prickly ash – interesting that I should mix those two up!  And horseradish.  Serious stuff.

July 30, 2009

Happy Birthday to – Ugh!

Filed under: God-bothering, The madness of Mark — lizardyoga @ 7:30 am
Tags: ,

Mark’s birthday today – 42.  AND it’s on a Thursday.  I bought him Richard Dwkins’ God Delusion and a book called The Case for God.

I am not feeling well today.  I think I’m just exhausted from waking up at between 4.30 and 6 am every morning.

For the last month.

Going to stay in bed today.

Yawn

Out

July 27, 2009

Marcus Garvey update

Yes!  Mark posted the question on Yahoo Answers and got 3 answers, one of which was “erm…” and the other two of which had vaguely heard of him.

Yes!  Vindication.

Not that I care about winning arguments of course.  it’s the truth I care about.  And the truth is….

I was right!  And Mark was wrong!

Yes!  Picture me doing a dance of triumph.  All morning.

Kirk out

July 26, 2009

Good night last night

Went to Mirch Marsala, a total veg.  It’s a place in town which has several menus including Italian, Chinese, Thai and both Indian and South Indian (the South Indian includes thalis and doshas, the Indian is more your typical korma and nan-bread stuff.  Ruth, as instructed by Mark, had a rose lassi followed by Thai vegetables, I had a spag bol (divine) and a chocolate fudge cake.  Ruth paid for me as a birthday present.  Thanks, Ruth!

I think I ought to stay off wine as it seems to be giving me a headache.  And, in case you’re tempted to laugh sarcastically, I only had one glass last night.

Yet one more example of what I have to put up with:

Mark:  Guess what?  Marisa (a friend of ours) has never heard of Marcus something or other.

Me:  Who?

Mark:  Marisa.

(Now, I don’t know about you, but to me it was PERFECTLY obvious that the “who?” related to the second person and not the first.  I know who Marisa is.  Feeling a little bloody-minded, I decided I couldn’t be bothered to explain, so I just said:

Me:  No.  Who?

Mark:  Marisa!

I think this verges on the obstinate, frankly.  So, after we’d gone through this a couple more times and I’d told him that, for God’s sake, it was perfectly obvious that I’d never heard of this person either, he stormed out of the room saying:

-  for God’s sake!  You’ve heard of Haile Selassie!

Which is indisputable.  But what does it all mean?  No doubt Mark will post a comment

Kirk out

Additional:  reminds me of a joke.

First Ethiopian:  are you Haile Selassie?

Second Ethiopian:  no, I’m afraid I’m only slightly Selassie.

PS  Marcus Garvey.  I really haven’t heard of him.  Have you?  Let me know, especially if you haven’t.   Anything that allows me to show Mark and go: “Ha!”

July 25, 2009

Q R Code

Filed under: The madness of Mark, culcha, female and male — lizardyoga @ 7:14 am
Tags: , ,

Another glimpse into the hell that is my married life.  I was just about to get up when Mark said:

-  I wonder if you can use Q R codes on PCs?

(now, I know what a PC is but what the hell is the other thing?)

-  What?  I said, wearily

-  A QR code, he said.  He has the EXTREMELY annoying habit of just repeating what he said when people clearly don’t understand.

-  What is a QR code? I said, even more wearily than before.

-  That is, he said, pointing to what I can only describe as a squiggle within a square on a page of his New Scientist.

At this point I had had enough.

-  That is NOT an explanation, Mark!” I said.  Then we both laughed.

(See previous post about “explanation mark” – May 19, 2009)

Bottle, jar, jar, bottle

Filed under: The madness of Mark, culcha — lizardyoga @ 6:31 am
Tags: , ,

I found myself thinking this as I went downstairs this morning at the hour of sevenish.  (Remember Devonish beer?  Does it still exist?  It’s one of those beers that sounds as if it ought to be good, but isn’t.)  Anyway, I found myself reciting the words of Tommy Cooper, as one must.

Whenever two or three brain cells are gathered together, they shall repeat the words of Tommy Cooper:

-  Bottle – jar – jar – bottle

- Hahaha

-  Just like that.

I have a previous blog posting entitled, “There’s nothing wrong with not being Tommy Cooper.  Now, why on earth would I say a thing like that?

British Wheel meeting postponed today, thank god!  I really didn’t want to go to Coventry.

Ruth is coming tonight.

Sister and partner in Mexico now.  Wonder how they’re doing.

Chris has suggested that I read some books by somebody Rankin, about pubs in Brentford.  Sounds like something I might enjoy.  (See, Chris?  Now I’ve mentioned you three times!)

Coach is now confirmed – 8.30 am Vaughan College.  If you want a seat, let me know.

Kirk out

Additional: apparently “There’s nothing wrong with not being Tommy Cooper” was something Mark once said to me.

Additional additional: last night Mark was looking at a picture of a brain with legs on it, and I said, “what’s that?” and he said, “it’s a Boltzmann brain” as though that explained everything.

See what I have to put up with?

July 3, 2009

It’s the drain of my life…

One constant issue which we have in the house of Grayure (for that is who we are) is that of the battery on this laptop.  Picture, if you will, (and I know I’ve asked you to do this before and to do it again may be verging on the unreasonable) the two of us sitting up in bed with me tack-tacking away on the lap-top.  Not unnaturally, after a couple of steamy posts and a bit of emailing, not to mention me chipping away at some of my stories, all of which takes a toll on the old battery cells, the little light at the bottom starts to turn from green to a rather jaundiced yellow.  Of course, there’s a truly helpful icon at the top which tells you exactly how much time you have left.  Which gives rise to the thought: what if there was an icon somewhere in your consciousness which told you exactly how much time you had left on earth?  Scary.

Anyway, the title is because Mark, on bringing the laptop in, referred to it as “the drattery”.  A much better name, I thought.

Some responses to my Fourth Plinth thing: Anna says I could do it for peace as it’s the day before Hiroshima Day.

Still need a minibus.  Anyone out there have one?

Enjoy the day.  I shall be watching Murray.  Come on, Andy!  If he makes the final I shall be ecstatic – if he WINS!!!

…my joy will know no bounds.  But possibly some leaps.

Enough!  Or too much, as William Blake said.

TTFN

May 18, 2009

D I Wife

Excellent philosophy session this morning about left/right brain activity, tendencies in gender – and Maths!  I am not terrified of maths as I used to be partly out of sheer bloody-mindedness ie I refuse to be frightened by anything that doesn’t have a central nervous system and an array of very sharp teeth – and partly – if I’m honest – because of The Husband.  Yes, it’s true – his interminable burblings on the subject have penetrated the densely-packed Artistic grey matter of my  mind, and I now have a different perspective on the subject.  Couldn’t tell you anything about it, but it feels better.

So, as part of this discussion on gender tendencies one woman said she had recently put up a garden shed, and I commented on my DIY activities and the fact that they are due to said spouse’s lack of ability in this area.  To which Mark responded, when I told him, “DI Wife”.

I thought that was quite good.

Last night went to see a film at a local church about Christianity and homosexuality.  I’ve never had a problem, not being gay myself, though I have had problems with Christians and yoga, as I said before.

that’s all.  Om shantih

Liz

PS Just want to add, in the light of June 16th’s posting, that the film was very definitely sympathetic to gays and lesbians and in no way condemnatory.  Unfortunately, it was American and therefore not so relevant to this country as it might otherwise be (“it’s here they’ve got the range and the machinery for change/it’s here they’ve got the spiritual thirst”)*

* Quote from “Democracy” by Leonard Cohen.  Great song!  I laughed out loud when I heard the line, at the end of a long first verse:

Democracy is coming

to the USA

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