Here are a couple of puns for you which just came to me today:
pan-stick – a lipstick which makes you one with everything
Peter pan-stick – a stick which makes you look eternally young.
And that one set me off thinking about Dorian Gray. I’ve always thought Oscar Wilde seemed like someone who was afraid of himself and of what he might do if let loose on society. Dorian Gray preys on young boys and girls alike; he murders and corrupts the innocent; he ruins lives. Gray, being a sort of alter ego of Wilde’s, represents two sides of his character, the hidden and the public. In public his face is clean and innocent, but in private he hides a well of corruption.
This surely has to do with Wilde not being ‘out’ as a homosexual. One can only speculate on the damage it does to be unable, your whole life, to express that which is a deepest part of your reality. Now, my significant other (as I have begun to call them) and I have been having conversations about sexuality. I maintain that hetero- and homo-sexuality run deep within most people: in other words, whichever is your orientation, it’s a profound part of you. Hence the word – orientation. It’s what you’re pointed at, as a ship is oriented towards its destination. It’s your sat-nav.
OK that’s enough analogies. The point is, you can’t choose your sexual orientation, else why would there be gays and lesbians in countries where it’s illegal – and, moreover, where punishments for homosexual acts can be horrific?
So: here’s the thing I’m trying to put together – I would not have married a woman. I would not have married a trans woman or a cis woman, or any other kind of woman – because I’m not gay. And yet I’m being asked to stay married to someone who regards themselves as a woman. So you tell me how that works. MSO, as I’m now going to call them, would like me to see our marriage as a lesbian relationship.
Nuh-uh. Ain’t gonna happen.
If you’re wondering where this sudden burst of frankness has come from, it’s because MSO just published a blog post about all this. Like all their posts, its increeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedibly long but here it is:
Like most of his posts it contains not so much a welter as a positive spattering of ideas, and after I’ve finished reading it he says, ‘What do you think?’
Where to start?
Well, I’ll let you read it and form your own opinions. As you have now read this, please likewise form and state your opinions below.
*My Significant Other (MSO – sounds a bit military, don’t it?)