God, I miss the screaming…

Yes!  Yes!  Almost back to normal now.  I have written a couple of poems to do on the plinth and it’s really coming together now.  They are called “Peace One Day” and “Action!”  I’ll put them on here afterwards – don’t want to pre-empt the event.

I’m wondering if I should have a megaphone, and if so, how poems about peace are going to come across when shouted via a megaphone.  Reminds me of Vogon poetry – hence the title, which I think comes from the H2G2 film.

Tying up all the loose ends today.  Practising, and hopefully booking a holiday.  I’m staying tomorrow night with a friend of Claire’s called Anna – and for a while I thought she lived near St Peter’s Church, Edmonton, because she’s in London N9.  Turns out London N9 is quite a big area.  She’s not even near Oakfield Rd, Stoke Newington, where my grandparents came from – and it isn’t easy to get from one place to the other on the tube.  Ah well.   The holiday cottage I really want, though, is in Rustington, and I know that’s near where my grandparents retired.  Rustington is only a small town.

My head is coming together.  Thank god.

Kirk out.

(Oh, all right then – if you don’t know, it means “Hitch-Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”.  2 H’s and 2 G’s – geddit?)www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/

Help! We’ve come to church by mistake!

Unexpectedly went to Church of the Martrys today.  We were walking to Trinity when I felt All Wobbly (to use the technical term).  I said to Mark, I’m not going to make it – and at that point we were opposite the Martyrs!  They welcomed us very warmly.  I guess there’s a chance we might start going back there.

Couple of rounds in the park – felt fine doing them but a bit wobbly after.

Holly has gone to Lifebeat.  Claire and Stuart took her this year.

Kirk out

Should have said: Help!  We’ve come to church by mistake!  (Withnail and God)

Mark’s marvellous meds

Really good stuff – it goes all zingy in your mouth and then your brain starts to feel whizzy and your temples feel the blood again and, hey presto!  you’re starting to feel well on your way to recovery!

What do we want?  A gradual recovery!

When do we want it?  Phased in over a period of days!

It may not be snappy but it works.  Honest.  If you’re interested, it’s a mixture of slippery elm and oh damn something else – I’ve forgotten. * Mark has gone off to make coffee.

Holly is going to Lifebeat today – a young people’s camp where they do all sorts of stuff.  She is being given a lot of assistance with her place, for which relief much thanks!

We will go to church this morning and if I am up to it I may meet Peter for a drink or two in some pub called, uninspiringly, The Donkey.  I can’t remember what it used to be called.  The Horse and Hound or Dog and Duck.  Something normal.

I am not, however, drinking alcohol as I don’t think it will do my low blood pressure any good.

Incidentally, whenever I think of the Horse and Hound (which, thankfully, is not often, I pronounce it mentally The Hawce end Hind.  I used to have a book called “High Taw Tawk Propah-leah”, which was quite funny.  There was a guest speaker once came to one of our school Junior Speech Days (on which may the gods spit) called Miss Povah, and she talked exactly like that.  I spent the whole summer imitating her.)

But I digress.

Enjoy the day.  Get your browsers tuned to One&Other.co.uk and check out the webcam.  Don’t forget Weds at 1 pm!

Kirk out

Additional: since I am not physically 100% I may take the opportunity to do some poems up there – which was my original thought anyway!  I have one brewing in my head called “Peace one Day”

* Not slippery elm but prickly ash – interesting that I should mix those two up!  And horseradish.  Serious stuff.


this is the site for the webcam, which to me is proving addictive.  Watched about 3 hours yesterday – there’s something very restful about the lack of sound on many of the plinthers’ per – I was going to say, performances, but they’re not exactly that.  One of the best things about this project is that it’s not entertainment: people don’t feel the need to “dress up” what they do, to jazz it up, make it interesting: neither do they find it necessary to bleach their hair or put on lots of make-up (and that’s only the men!).  This project says, “people are interesting”.  This is an anti-celebrity project, and that, I think, is why I felt such a strong desire to be part of it.

Thanks, Antony!

Yesterday’s plinthers included a man who inflated balloons with helium and tied a package to them to publicise CLAPA (Cleft Lip and Palate Association).  He seemed to be getting people to phone him when the balloons landed – a brilliant idea.

One of the best things about this is you get to see what people’s real (as opposed to manufactured) preoccupations are.

Got to go now – need to – erm – bleach my hair.

Kirk (sheepishly) out.

Additional: yesterday I had a call from One and Other asking if they could pass my details to Sky Arts.  So I may be giving them an interview.  I may also be writing it up for a yoga magazine.

Nimbletwimble, puckyduck, fibby fob

… such were the sounds running through my brain as I woke up.  My brain usually wakes up about 15 minutes after the rest of me – as the rising sun sweeps over a lawn, causing the shadows to huddle to a point, so consciousness sweeps my body, starting with the feet.

Why the feet?  So you’re ready for action, I suppose.  But can the feet engage without the brain?

Mm.  Maybe there’s a primitive part of the brain which wakes up first, so that you’re ready for flight if necessary.  Does this make sense?

Does any of this make sense?

Today I am going to do some stretching.  Still tired after Monday’s 54 rounds, although waking up at 5.30 doesn’t help.

Seeing Depth in Trivial Thoughts

There’s something quite Proustian in the most everyday, trivial actions.  For example, when I come up to the bedroom, the top of my sewing box  seems an ideal place to put my teapot, milk jug and mug.  But once I reach the bed, once I am sitting up with the laptop on my knees – the tea seems very inconveniently placed.  Everyday life is made up of hundreds of such incidents – and I am convinced they affect our consciousness at least as much, maybe more than our larger actions.  Lilliputian.

I’ll leave you with that thought.

Enjoy the day, if not the weather.

Kirk out

Tewkesbury rules!

Watched the webcam yesterday to see what people are doing.  The first woman was just sitting around and taking photos of people on her mobile.  The second was much better – he had been made an honorary town crier for the occasion and was telling people about his home town of Tewkesbury.  It’s easy to sneer at pride of place, but I have a sneaking admiration for those who are proud of where they live and want to tell others about it.  (I come from Hounslow, and what little remains of its history – the heath, the coaching inns – has been erased, leaving it a no-man’s land under a flight-path.  It isn’t even at the end of the Piccadilly line any more.)  The information he gave out was good – unfortunately marred by a number of execrable poems, one of which turned out to be by John Betjeman (this just confirms my previous opinion of Betjeman.)

Remote and ineffectual fan

who dared attack my Betjeman

The cherry-picker was not as scary as I’d imagined, plus the plinth is not as terrifyingly high, now that I can picture myself up there.  From what I’ve seen so far (which admittedly is not very much) what I’ve got planned seems to be quite different and certainly more thought-out than some.  For example, the bloke who followed the Tewkesbury crier just stood there and paced up and down as though he was waiting for a bus.  After a minute he said:

–  I’m bored already – and there’s 59 minutes to go.

Did he not give any thought to what he was going to do?  Or did he think that inspiration would come to him once he was up there?  In my experience, that rarely happens.

(Incidentally, the Betjeman poem is a parody of one of his, which begins:

Remote and ineffectual Don

who dared attack my Chesterton

Enjoy the day!  I’m going to be resting.

Kirk out.

Speaking of total veg…

Yesterday Mark and I both fell asleep in church.  And the sermon was not boring – in fact it was good (Mark wishes it to be recorded that he didn’t actually fall asleep – he was just resting his eyes.  My grandad used to do a lot of that.)  On the way home, we both realised that we are exhausted – in fact I had asked for prayer for a holiday.  The woman who prayed with me was very nice and asked permission to touch me on the shoulder – THIS IS IMPORTANT – others please take note!

What we need is either:

an injection of cash


someone with a house by the sea who would like to swap and stay in our chalet in the woods.  Any offers?

It’s raining today.  Yesterday I spent the whole afternoon and evening watching films and having a bath.  I watched:

Shaun of the Dead

Shallow Grave

How to Get Ahead in Advertising

Bruce Almighty

We did stop watching How to Get Ahead in Advertising to listen to the Archers.  Does anyone hate Matt Crawford as much as I do?  Also, I was wondering whether Annette is actually going to meet Jazzer rather than Alice’s friends – but I could be wrong about that.  I just have the feeling she’s Up to Something.  (Wednesday: she wasn’t, at that point, but last night Jazzer phoned and she ditched her plans and agreed to go out with him.  The words “hiding” and “nothing” come to mind.)

Film-watching very therapeutic – went to bed at 8.45 and feel much better this morning.

Today I am going to train in the park at lunchtime.  All this week I will be training at 1 pm because that’s when I’m going to be up there!

And it’s raining.  Mark (blessings be upon him) is going to join me.


Kirk out